Tashlich humor

On the Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah, there is a ceremony called
Tashlich. Jews traditionally go to the ocean or a stream or river to
pray and throw bread crumbs into the water.

Symbolically, the fish devour their sins. Occasionally, people ask
what kind of bread crumbs should be thrown. Here are suggestions for
breads which may be most appropriate for specific sins and misbehaviors.

For ordinary sins.....................White Bread
For complex sins......................Multigrain
For twisted sins......................Pretzels
For sins of indecision................Waffles
For sins of chutzpah..................Fresh Bread
For committing auto theft.............Caraway
For timidity/cowardice................Milk Toast
For ill-temperedness..................Sourdough
For silliness, eccentricity...........Nut Bread
For war-mongering.....................Kaiser Rolls
For jingoism, chauvinism..............Yankee Doodles
For excessive irony...................Rye Bread
For erotic sins.......................French Bread
For particularly dark sins............Pumpernickel
For dressing immodestly...............Tarts
For causing injury to others..........Tortes
For being holier than thou............Bagels
For abrasiveness......................Grits
For dropping in without notice........Popovers
For overeating........................Stuffing
For pride and egotism.................Puff Pastry
For trashing the environment..........Dumplings
For telling bad jokes/puns............Corn Bread